Live Blogging the Return of my Blog and the End of Debates!

It's been months since I posted a blog! A year, even. 

But let's get on to business.

9:05- When you hear Joe the Plumber, drink! 

9:11- "Class warfare! Barack Obama is a communist!" 

9:16- McCain learned a queue from Sarah Palin. Don't answer the question at hand. "I-I-uh, energy." 

9:18- When McCain says "I know how to ______," drink! 

9:19- When McCain makes a point, he has a real shit head smile, you notice that? 

9:21- When McCain says "I will _____" in that shit head way, drink! 

9:22- McCain has a yellow notepad. Who still uses those? Also, shit head smile. Drink! 

9:23- Holy shit, McCain just got fucking bug eyed.

9:23- When Obama says McCain is George Bush, drink! 

9:24- John McCain grumpily shouts at that young man Bob Schieffer because McCain wants to speak longer. Also, long boring list. Also, shit head smile. 

9:25- Bill Ayers time! Ohboyohboyohboy! 

9:25- McCain is still bitching about the town halls, jesus christ. Get over it, old man. 

9:26- When McCain tried to say "my feelings were hurt" he came off as a robot.  

9:28- Shut your mouth, old man! It is true! "The American people don't care about your hurt feelings, OLD MAN." 

9:29- Just because we're not doing town halls, doesn't mean you're not an asshole. 

9:32-McCain looks like he's going to cry, he's been trying to get a word in and getting shut the fuck down every thirty seconds.

9:34- There are some really mean t-shirts at your rallies, Barack!

9:35- John McCain really likes to interrupt Barack Obama. ACORNS are out to destroy the world!

9:36- Ayers is officially thrown under the bus. DESPICABLE ACTS.

9:38- WARREN BUFFETT, OH DAYUM. JOE BIDEN, OH DAYUM. JIM JONES, OOOOOH DAYYUUUUUMMMM.

9:39- Barack Obama just laughed at McCain, literally.

9:40- He went from Ayers, to mysterious backgrounds, to economy, to taxes, all in fifteen seconds. Mad skillz, McCain.

9:42- McCain's talking about Palin. SAY MAVERICK, SAY MAVERICK, SAY MAVERICK.

9:43- HE MENTIONED THE RETARDS. ACE IN THE HOLE. #1 ISSUE FACING AMERICA TODAY.

9:48- Yawn, nothing funny, just boring shit for the past five minutes

9:51- "They're sending us thousands of cars. Thas' all good." He's so black and wonderful.

9:53- "Maybe you oughta go there. SONNY."

9:53- "People have been assassinated." There's John McCain scrawling on his notepad again. I think he just wrote in big letters "WHAT?!"

9:55- Hybrid cars are the DRIVERS of our economy in the future, LOLOLOLOLOLOLOL. Clever girl.

9:56- John McCain brought up Herbert Hoover, I'll trust him on this one, since he was alive for it.

9:58- My mom entered the room and is trying to talk to me, this is stunting my ability to watch the debate

9:59- JOE THE PLUMBER'S BACK. HEEEEEEEEEYYYYYYYY.

10:00- Fucking Joe. Can we stop talking about this dude?

10:03- As we reached the hour point, the debate has regressed to "Barack is a communist" and Joe the Plumber.

10:04- What the fuck? John McCain owns a gold-plated cadillac. Rich mother fucker.

10:05- Senator Government? Either a stupid attempt at Freudian slip, or a very Palinesque comment.

10:06- Joe the Plumber must be shitting his pants in glee, he's being mentioned all the fucking time.

10:10- Louie Ledbetter? That is a fake name. Did I miss that name? Because it just sounded so fake how I heard it.

10:14- Barack Obama is in favor of dead babies.

10:16- Last question, finally.

10:17- I hear education. Drink if McCain brings up kindergarten sex education.

10:18- Education=Civil Rights? Wat.

10:23- LOL, the education system is completely irrelevant to NYC, because we already did all the shit they're talking about

10:24- He said transparency four times in thirty seconds

10:24- He brought up Sarah Palin's retarded kid again, nice.

10:25- Let's institute a new rule. DC gets voting rights when their kids can read.

10:26- John McCain looks like a complete asshole. THERE AREN'T ENOUGH VOUCHERS BLAH BLAH KEKEKEKEKEKE.

10:27- Old people always sound so awkward when they read website names, Bob Schieffer.

10:30- Please mention college. HE MENTIONED COLLEGE! ALRIGHT!

I got really lazy at the end, sorry.

BUT- We Need A Beard is back! Bookmark and check for updates!